A Change of Direction

So many of us have been there. That moment in your life when you think to yourself, "Something needs to change. I can't go on feeling like this anymore!". The problem often is, that we just don't know how. We are stuck in a rut. Believe me, I know that feeling all too well. There is no magic pill, as much as we all wish that there was, but there are changes that we can make, in order to start living our lives in a way that makes us feel ALIVE and HAPPY. In the past couple of months, I have made 3 changes in my life that have helped me do just that. Exercise, clean, portion controlled eating, and personal development. I had the help of my wonderful friend and coach, Tatiana Amico, and it has changed my life so much in such a short period, that I want to pay it forward to others who are struggling like I was.

This is my story. If any of this resonates with you, or you think you could benefit from incorporating clean eating and exercise in your life, please don't hesitate to contact me via Facebook or email (jaime@jaimerubeniuk.com). I'd love to help you! 

I am 35 and mom to 3 beautiful boys, ages 5, 3 and 4 months. To say that they keep me busy in an understatement! Lol. I love them with all my heart, but I'm not gonna lie, it's pretty crazy a lot of the time. I've struggled with depression a lot of my life, as well as negative thinking, binge eating, and people pleasing. Pile 3 crazy boys on top of all that, and you have a recipe for disaster. I've always been really great at faking a smile and pretending everything is okay, but who the heck wants to go through life like that? Not me. 

A huge part of my struggle as a mom, is that I have never really focused on myself. Once and awhile, here and there, sure, but I have  never made a serious commitment to take care of me. I'd always hear people say that in order to take care of anyone else, you need to take care if yourself first, but those words never fully sunk in. The same goes for loving yourself. If you don't take care of yourself, you start loving yourself less, and when you don't love yourself, you don't take care of yourself. It's a vicious cycle. 

With each pregnancy I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes, as well as post partum depression. I did really well controlling my diet during pregnancy and never had to take insulin, but as soon as baby was born, BAM!! GIVE ME FOOD! And not healthy food (well, some), but it was like I had to make up for all the carbs and sugar I missed out on during pregnancy. I stayed strong during my pregnancies for the baby inside me, but couldn't seem to do the same for myself afterwards. 

I've also always been emotional eater. If something good happened, it was an excuse to celebrate, with food. If something bad happened, it was a reason to curl up in the couch and shove my face full of food. Family gatherings, food. Baby shower? Food. Birthday? Food. And booze. Let's not forget that. You get the idea. 

My PPD this time around has been far less, although I do believe it was my worsening condition that prompted me on this journey. I felt great right after birth, but then started binge eating again and quickly started feeling horrible, I was headed for rock bottom pretty quickly, and decided I had nothing to lose. By no means am I saying that lifestyle changes can cure PPD, as it is a very complicated condition, but I do believe it can help immensely.

So fast forward to today. I've been on a journey of learning to love myself and treat myself with respect, through exercise, portion control, eating REAL whole foods, and reading/listening to personal development. Eating poorly and not exercising made me into a grumpy, unhappy, mom, who had a really good chance of developing type 2 diabetes in the future. I'm changing all of that. I am in control. This is my life, and I'm taking it back. I'm becoming the mother I want to be, being an awesome role model for my kids (ps. They are eating much better now too, yay!), showing them how to live a healthy lifestyle, and LIVING my life. Not just surviving it. I cannot emphasize enough how much of a difference these changes have made in my life. I still have a long ways to go, but the future is looking bright :) Oh, and looking more fabulous each day is definitely an added bonus! ;) 

Here is a picture of my physical transformation so far.